On job interview questions that one shouldn't ask
- Stephen Fry: "What are your weaknesses?" is a common question. You're supposed to say one that is kinda not terrible... Like "I tend to get bogged down by details."
- David Mitchell: "I'm a terrible thief. I love other people's stuff."
- Stephen Fry: "I also can't con - Oh look! There's a squirrel!"
- Phil Jupitus: "Heroin and masturbating. Not necessarily in that order."
- Stephen Fry: "What are your strengths?"
- Alan Davies: "I've got a powerful odour. It'll only get stronger as the day goes on."
- Stephen Fry: You're still wearing your I-don't-want-a-job hat.
- *buzzer*buzzer*buzzer*
- David Mitchell: ...Alan.
- Alan Davies: Oh sorry, I just fell.
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
192 plays
Alan Davies and David Mitchell argue about the scent of rocks.
20/11/2011
. 233 notes . Reblog
I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH
- Stephen Fry: Who was the most famous person to lose at chess to a machine?
- David Mitchell: Well, the Queen is the most famous person around, isn't she?
- Stephen Fry: No this person has a higher ranking than the Queen
- Alan Davies: JESUS!
- Stephen Fry: Jesus isn't a rank.
10/11/2011
. 113 notes . Reblog
Stephen Fry: Which of these is the odd one out?
[Shows pictures of a machine gun, a tomato, and a jellyfish]
David Mitchell: You’ve asked which one’s the odd one out— they all are!
Stephen Fry: They’re all the odd one out.
Bill Bailey: Of what?
Stephen Fry: They kind of are, aren’t they. Well, there is a misapprehension about jellyfish, um— if you’re stung by a jellyfish, what are you supposed to do?
Alan Davies: Wee on it.
Stephen Fry: Yes. The odd thing is, the jellyfish is the odd one out because it’s the only one you’re not supposed to wee on.
Alan Davies: You’re supposed to wee on a tomato?
Stephen Fry: Yes! Weeing on tomatoes is good, and weeing on machine guns—
David Mitchell: I’ve never been stung by a tomato. I have to say, if they’d known about the weeing in the First World War, it could’ve saved a lot of casualties.
Stephen Fry: Well it did, actually, they did use them—
David Mitchell: What, after the first wave on the Somme everyone’s following with their cocks out?
QI 9x02 (via vlieger)
[Shows pictures of a machine gun, a tomato, and a jellyfish]
David Mitchell: You’ve asked which one’s the odd one out— they all are!
Stephen Fry: They’re all the odd one out.
Bill Bailey: Of what?
Stephen Fry: They kind of are, aren’t they. Well, there is a misapprehension about jellyfish, um— if you’re stung by a jellyfish, what are you supposed to do?
Alan Davies: Wee on it.
Stephen Fry: Yes. The odd thing is, the jellyfish is the odd one out because it’s the only one you’re not supposed to wee on.
Alan Davies: You’re supposed to wee on a tomato?
Stephen Fry: Yes! Weeing on tomatoes is good, and weeing on machine guns—
David Mitchell: I’ve never been stung by a tomato. I have to say, if they’d known about the weeing in the First World War, it could’ve saved a lot of casualties.
Stephen Fry: Well it did, actually, they did use them—
David Mitchell: What, after the first wave on the Somme everyone’s following with their cocks out?
QI 9x02 (via vlieger)
Jimmy Carr: That’s horrifying.
Alan: That day I had to have a child’s head on my body all day.
David: I feel really left out. Can’t I be like the dog or something?
-Series E, Episode 8 - Eyes and Ears
